Category: Blog

Remember those lazy summer days of our childhood, sprawled out on the mud, lost in daydreams, ideas blossoming like dandelions in the air? Life back then felt simpler, driven by physical work and fueled by the quiet hum of existence. Today, the world beats with a different rhythm, demanding mental sharpness, relentless hustling, and an ever-present feeling of “not enough.” We work 8 to 9 hours a day, often feeling underpaid and overworked, yet we are constantly seeking new ways to grow, to optimize, and to achieve that unreachable sense of success.

Even the haven of solitude—those precious moments of thinking on the terrace steps—seemed to have vanished for me, consumed by the demands of work and responsibility. I miss the tranquility and creative spark they used to bring.

This scarcity of time, ironically, makes me ponder deeper questions. What if we traded the corporate ladder for the freedom of entrepreneurship?

Then again, wouldn’t that just mean that we would have new masters to answer to—investors, customers, and the never-ending pressure to succeed? Even CEOs and prosperous business owners appear to be weighed down by the pressure of expectations, just like any other individual striving for success.

Then there’s the allure of simpler lives, like the self-sufficient communities in Japan, living by their own rhythms, cultivating crops, and fostering a sense of “ikigai”—their reason for being. It sounds idyllic, but perhaps a touch delusional in our interconnected world.

These thoughts spiral downward, leading me to question the very purpose of our existence. Are we trapped in a hamster wheel of work, bills, and responsibilities, driven by some vague notion of progress but lacking any true meaning? A meme highlighting a monkey happily existing without bills significantly contrasts our human-made system, where even basic survival comes at a cost.

It’s easy to get lost in this existential crisis, but amidst it all, I find myself yearning for something more. Not necessarily complete escape, but perhaps a balance—a way to navigate the inevitable hustle while carving out spaces for reflection, for boredom, for the spark of creativity that leads to a more fulfilling life.

The answers might not be grand pronouncements, but rather small steps: embracing moments of mindfulness, aligning work with purpose, seeking communities that resonate, and remembering that every step towards a fulfilling life is a step in the right direction. This is not an ending, but the beginning of a conversation.

What are your thoughts on the hustle, the boredom, and the big questions? Share your experiences, your struggles, and your hopes in the mail. Let’s explore this journey together, and who knows, maybe in the process, we might just find a way to reclaim a little bit of that childhood peace and discover the answers to the big questions that have been weighing on our minds.

Cheers!!

Don’t miss out! Get notified about new blog posts straight to your inbox !   (No spam, pinky promise!)

Enter your email below to receive updates

I was nervous at first because I didn’t know much about movie terminology, but at a friend’s recommendation, I decided to give movie reviews a try. This time, I’m discussing the movie “Lover,” which takes a novel approach to the subject of love. So prepare for spoilers and grab some popcorn!

Spoiler alert! We’re going deep into “Lover.” Watch it first if you want to avoid spoilers.

Forget the typical happily-ever-after romance. Lover delves into the ups and downs of a real-life relationship. The title is gender-neutral, reflecting the story’s focus on both perspectives. We meet Arun and Divya, who fall in love during college. But as they navigate careers, family dramas, and personal struggles, their love faces challenges. It goes beyond the usual love tales you see in Kollywood, standing out because it explores the difficulties of keeping a relationship strong amidst family, work, and friendships. It shows the complexities and challenges that come with love, making it a realistic and relatable story.

The movie kicks off with the protagonists falling in love during their college days. However, as they graduate and focus on their careers, the relationship encounters inevitable obstacles. Arun, the male lead, comes from a dysfunctional family with a troubled past, leading to his insecurities and a tendency to exert control over his lover, Divya. This control becomes suffocating for Divya, prompting her to resort to lies to avoid Arun’s anger. The birthday celebration highlights this perfectly: the initial joy feels absent by the end.

The story introduces Divya’s friends, who play an important role in challenging the depth and direction of her relationship with Arun. Their emphasis on the importance of freedom becomes a focal point, emphasizing that this value must not be compromised, not only for Divya but also for Arun. Despite Arun’s desire for such friendships, these statements, while powerful, do not resonate with him as strongly, adding layers of complexity to the entire story.

The film addresses the highs and lows of a relationship, shedding light on the impact of family dynamics on individuals. Arun’s mother’s parallel story adds depth to the narrative, showcasing her struggle to break free from a toxic relationship.

The movie subtly explores the different roles men play in relationships, depicting characters at various stages of personal growth and understanding. Arun’s father, consistently drunk and ill-treating, embodies one extreme. Arun, unknowingly causing harm in the name of love, represents another. Madan, who recognizes his mistakes and learns from them, stands as a contrasting figure. Finally, Harish emerges as a character who respects women’s spaces.

While the movie has its pacing issues, it delivers impactful emotions. You’ll feel the anger towards Arun’s father, Arun’s jealousy towards Madan, the liberation of Arun’s mother, and the pain of Divya. Even after their separation, you’ll sense the lingering feelings between Arun and Divya.

At the end, both Arun and Divya grow individually. Arun builds a successful cafe, while Divya overcomes her fear of surfing and her unsteadiness. They both find happiness and fulfilment in their own paths.

The movie concludes with a poignant quote: “Love does not begin and end the way we seem to think it does. Love is a battle; love is a war; love is growing up.”

“Lover” sets itself apart by delving into the complexities of love that go beyond traditional “happily ever after” ends. For those looking for a thought-provoking love story, the film is an appealing one to watch due to its portrayal of complex relationships and strong emotional elements.

Cheers!

PS: Music was pleasing!

Thank you for reading ♡!

If you found this helpful, please give it a thumbs up and share it with anyone who might find it useful!

If you like what you see and wish to support my work, then

Share your thoughts/suggestions at the comment section or mail at

randomwhyss[@]gmail[dot]com

Don’t miss out! Get notified about new blog posts straight to your inbox !  (No spam, pinky promise!)

Don’t miss out! Get notified about new blog posts straight to your inbox !

(No spam, pinky promise!)

Enter your mail to receive updates

You are what you eat, right? Lately, I’ve been pretty focused on the types of food I’m putting into my body, and the same goes for my family (keener on them than me). It’s not a super serious obsession, but it’s definitely something I’ve been thinking about. If you’re curious, you can check out my latest post on Plate Progression.

I’ve become a keen listener of podcasts, especially those featuring various Doc on social media, and I’ve also delved into a few books that have piqued my curiosity. Recently, I watched a documentary series on Netflix - You are what you eat – A twin study experiment health on 22 pairs of twins but 4 pairs were casted.

One twin followed a vegan diet, while the other went for an omnivore diet. Before the diet kicked in, they measured things like weight, lean mass, fat mass, gut microbiome, sexual arousal, problem-solving abilities, memory, telomeres, and epigenetics.

For the first four weeks, they were provided with food, and for the remaining time, they had to cook their own meals (same diet). They also had a trainer and a food coach. The study didn’t just focus on the twins; it also delved into how animals contribute to the climate crisis, environmental pollution, diseases, parasites, etc. The emphasis was on promoting a veganism or plant-based diet.

At the end of the study, the twins on the plant-based diet, coupled with proper resistance training and cardio, experienced a loss in fat mass without compromising lean mass. They also showed improved gut health, increased telomere length, and heightened sexual arousal. However, there was no change in memory, probably because the study was relatively short-term.

The vegan diet, as expected, had its drawbacks, like the long-term lack of Vitamin B12 and Vitamin D, and the lower absorption of iron from plant-based sources. Those weren’t covered. On the positive side, the fiber in plant-based diets nourishes the microbiome, contributing to serotonin production, our happy hormone.

I recall reading in “The Myth of Normal” about telomeres, where longer telomeres indicate better aging and a longer lifespan. The study suggested that those on a vegan diet experienced an increase in telomere length. Additionally, the body tends to use energy stored in muscles (lean mass) before tapping into fat mass if there’s no resistance training or weight lifting. One more thing to be noted is that you need to eat a lot if you’re on a plant-based diet, but you might feel full after a few bites. That’s the drawback.

I can’t help but feel a bit biased at times. There were periods when meat and processed foods were heavily advertised, and now it seems like the spotlight is on veganism. And I am not in favor of killing animals as well. Anyway, capitalism tends to come out on top in the end.

Understanding whether something is truly healthy or just a marketed product isn’t easy for the average common person. Right? It often requires personal experimentation. What are your thoughts on this?

Cheers!

PS: Sign up to receive the latest post in your inbox!

Don’t miss out! Get notified about new blog posts straight to your inbox !  (No spam, pinky promise!)

Enter your email below to receive updates

• Instagram

Ever come across a question so simple that it makes you think twice? That’s what happened to me after watching a video or reel by Baron Ryan (IG profile- Here, go check him out!). He casually dropped this gem: “What was your problem three problems ago?”

It caught me off guard. I mean, who remembers what bothered them three obstacles back? But after a sec, I did scroll into another one (lol). Yet, the more I thought about it, the deeper it went.

So, I went down memory lane, starting with the mini-mountains of the day. Finding fresh blueberries in this town? Mission impossible, and I even pestered my friend to get a hold of a supplier. Is hair falling out faster than leaves in autumn? Major stress. My parents’ diet? A constant battle. Bruno needs deworming. Gross, but gotta do it. And then there was the blog page (here), which I wasn’t updating often, the client payment I was waiting for (I got scammed, I think), and the list went on. These are  the paper cuts on our fingers, the tiny thorns that prick our patience. We deal with them, find alternatives, and they fade into the background noise of existence.

Then came the bigger ones, the monsters under the bed we once feared. Layoffs {phew, still employed! (touch wood)}, student loans (paid off, thank goodness!), even a crippling fear of dogs (seriously, I wouldn’t go near my cousin’s house for years!). Now, I have a furry friend snoring next to me every night. These were the boulders I had to push and the mountains I had to climb. They tested our grit, sucked the air out of our lungs, and yet, somehow, we scaled them. Isn’t it?

But life isn’t a fair game, right? I have a bigger one to climb now (lol). Do I have the courage to climb it right now? Definitely not. Maybe I will find it within. And this reminds me of a quote.

Courage doesn’t always roar. Sometimes courage is the quiet voice at the end of the day saying, I will try again tomorrow. – Mary Anne Radmacher

Life throws these curveballs and these obstacles, big and small, and it doesn’t care if you’re ready or not. But that’s the beauty of this question: “What was my problem three problems ago?” It reminds us that every struggle, big or small, makes us stronger, wiser, and yes, even funnier (trust me, laughing at past stress is a stress-buster).

Let’s share our stories, laugh at the chaos, and climb those peaks together! They might be tough, but hey, who doesn’t love a good adventure?

Now, if you’ll excuse me, I have a dog that needs belly rubs.

Cheers!

If it resonates, Please share & do follow my IG :)

PS : The Climb – Song that helped me with various incidents

I do send out my posts to very few people. Join my mailing list if you enjoy what you read.

The issue of population growth, particularly in the context of India’s surging numbers, has occupied my thoughts for some time. It presents a curious paradox: a surge in births in one part of the world set against the ominous undertone of demographic decline elsewhere. From Japan and South Korea to European states and Russia, numerous nations are grappling with declining fertility rates. Are we experiencing a global case of FOHO, the Fear of Having Offspring?

The finger of blame often points towards the rising cost of living. Raising children isn’t just about smiles and giggles; it’s a financial tightrope walk that can leave even the most stable feeling wobbly. Existential questions arise, questioning the wisdom of bringing new life into a world where suffering is a potential outcome, especially if we are uncertain about providing a nurturing environment.

Remember those picture-perfect ancestors with their armloads of kids? They didn’t have TED Talks on childhood trauma or podcasts about mindful parenting. But we do. Such concerns are valid. We now possess a heightened awareness of the intricate nuances of child development, acknowledging the profound impact of a mother’s mental well-being, as emphasized in many research articles on the internet.

The question emerges: are we, armed with this awareness, choosing to abstain from the traditional path of prolific reproduction? Is this a conscious evolution, a decision to step off the birth-and-breed treadmill? Or is there a more nuanced explanation at play?

And speaking of the “why,” Elon Musk. Just recently, he tweeted, “The bigger problem that humanity faces is population collapse.” Maybe it’s not such a simple story. Perhaps it’s a tango of economics, existential worries, and a newfound respect for the weight of raising a child. We’re not just saying “no” to kids; we’re rewriting the whole family playbook.

This isn’t about judging who’s right or wrong. It’s an invitation to ponder the larger picture and comprehend the multifaceted forces shaping our reproductive choices. Are we witnessing the birth pangs of a new evolutionary era where quality surpasses quantity? Or are we, perhaps, victims of our own overthinking of childlessness?. And most importantly, are healthy children only for the privileged people who can afford them and make them better?

Only time will reveal the answers. For now, let’s make room for the complexities, anxieties, and aspirations swirling around this fertility enigma. By understanding the reasons behind our choices, we might illuminate a path towards a future where families, in all their diverse forms, can flourish.

Cheers!

PS: Share your thoughts at randomwhyss[at]gmail[dot]com

I do send out my posts to very few people. Join my mailing list if you enjoy what you read.

• Instagram

As we flip the calendar to 01/01/2024, life stretches out like a blank canvas, begging for vibrant strokes. Sure, the clock struck midnight, but it’s not just the date that feels new. It’s the air, thrumming with a potent cocktail of hope, anticipation, and a dash of nervous excitement. And of course, there’s the elephant in the room: resolutions.

I admit, I’m giggling as I write this. Last year’s resolutions, neatly penned in a notebook, lie dormant in a dusty drawer. Finishing the books, getting that driver license—nothing worked. Instead, life wildly pulls me in a different direction. Those rigid resolutions, I suspect, whispered accusations in the back of my mind: “Slacker! Failure!”

The truth, as I discovered later that year, isn’t about brute force. It’s about whispering to your soul, understanding the patterns that hold you back, and gently coaxing change into your habits. It’s about understanding, not just knocking out.

New Year’s Eve brought a revelation in the form of a movie Kho gaye hum kahan (no spoilers, but three friends, a slice of life—you get the picture). Among the laughter and introspection, these resolutions glittered like gems.

• Ditch the filter and embrace the real. Life, it seems, is best lived unfiltered, blemishes and all.
• Slow down; keep it real. Authenticity, it turns out, is the key that unlocks genuine connection.
• Silence the inner critic; celebrate your uniqueness. Comparison, that joy thief, needs to be banished.
• Gratitude is the secret sauce. Be grateful
• Find your tribe. Surround yourself with souls who celebrate your quirks.

Exploring these resolutions was a refreshing perspective, especially considering the need for them in our current times. The challenge, of course, lies in translating these noble intentions into everyday life. Yet, acknowledging them as we navigate our actions is a significant step.

I’m not aiming for perfection. I’m embracing the messy, imperfect beauty of the journey. Personally, I aspire to greet the morning sun and incorporate more fiber into my diet. Let’s ditch the generic resolutions and craft those with intentions that resonate with your personal journey.

Let our resolutions be whispered wishes, not deafening demands. And remember, dear reader, the most powerful compass you hold is the one within. Happy New Year!

Cheers to 2024🥂

I do send out my posts to very few people. Join my mailing list if you enjoy what you read.

• Instagram

Food—it’s the fuel that keeps us running, the centerpiece of celebrations, and a surprisingly hot topic of debate. For centuries, folks have been arguing about what lands on their plates, with vegetarians, meat lovers, and now vegans, all weighing in with their preferences. But is there a right or wrong answer to this culinary conundrum?

In the food world, there’s a connection between what we eat and how living things depend on each other, forming a food web. It illustrates the passage of energy and nutrients from one living thing to another, emphasizing that our food choices contribute to a broader picture beyond our dinner table.

Now, the reasons for choosing one plate over another are as diverse as the dishes themselves. Vegans often cite ethical concerns, animal welfare being a big one. Plus, plant-based diets are bursting with vitamins, minerals, and dietary fiber, which can lower the risk of some diseases. 

Meat eaters, on the other hand, highlight the nutritional punch of protein, iron, and vitamin B12 found in animal products. And let’s not forget the taste! A juicy steak or a perfectly grilled chicken wing can be a symphony of flavors for some, whereas vegans refrain from not only meat but also animal-derived products like dairy, eggs, and honey.

The idea of humans as apex predators, dominating the food chain with our sharp teeth and clever minds, held a certain primal allure. Meat was fuel; it was flavor. But then, reality took a bite. The humans were opportunistic omnivores, relying on plants and fruits as their primary sustenance, only feasting on meat when the opportunity arose. They weren’t slaves to their primal urges, but adaptable beings who made calculated choices based on what was available.

We weren’t simply apex predators, but resourceful omnivores, adapting our diets to the environment and circumstances. This inherent adaptability, I believe, lies at the heart of our evolving relationship with food, and it certainly played a crucial role in my own personal journey.

Sharing my home with a dog, a being capable of such profound love, forced me to confront the disconnect between the animals on my plate and the companions by my side. It wasn’t an overnight epiphany, but a gradual shift in perspective. Exploring the benefits of a plant-based diet and the health benefits of a fiber-rich diet brought a slight change, and meat consumption started to decline.

Of course, this isn’t about judging people. At the end of the day, what fills your plate is like a personal fingerprint, shaped by where you came from, what tickles your taste buds, and even the furry friends in your life. The point is, there’s no universal recipe for the perfect plate. Food choices are a fascinating reflection of our personal journeys; they’re not connected to any religious rules. Some might dig a plant-powered feast, while others find comfort in different dishes. The key is not to point fingers or decide what’s “okay” and what’s not.

The choice of what we eat is deeply personal, and it’s important to respect everyone’s dietary preferences. Whether you choose vegetarian, vegan, meat-lover, or anywhere in between, the key is to be mindful and do our best to make informed choices that align with our values and beliefs.

So, let’s celebrate the diversity on our plates, Bon Appetit!

Cheers!

Don’t miss out! Get notified about new blog posts straight to your inbox !  (No spam, pinky promise!)

Enter your email below to receive updates.

• Instagram

Envy, often referred to as the green-eyed monster, is a universal emotion that everyone of us experiences at some point in our lives. It can manifest in various forms, from longing for someone else’s success to coveting their possessions.

Jealousy often comes from what’s going on around us. Thanks to social media, everyone picks and shares only the best stuff, including us. It’s all about the perfect filtered pictures, but the behind-the-scenes moments are kept secret. What we see might not be the whole story, just the parts people want us to see.

Envy often kicks in when we measure ourselves against others, creating a feeling of inadequacy. It’s essential to recognize that feeling envious is a normal part of being human. Digging into the hormonal side of this emotion revealed a complex process. Factors like low oxytocin, serotonin, dopamine, or elevated cortisol levels play a role in shaping our experience of envy. Understanding these aspects can shed light on the intricate nature of this emotion.

At times, envy acts like a mirror, showing us our wants and ambitions. By pinpointing what triggers envy, we gain insights into our values and goals, helping us better understand ourselves.

To be honest, I’ve experienced this emotion at different points in my life, and it often translated into anger. I used to push those feelings down without reflecting on them. It’s tough to admit out loud that I’ve been jealous of various people at different times.

There are times when we’re only conscious of our problems and oblivious to others’. Everyone faces their own challenges, but not everyone discusses them openly, especially until you become close to them. Realizing this makes me less envious. A book that really opened my eyes to this perspective was “The Almanack of Naval Ravikant.” I read a particular passage three times to let it sink in, and I find myself revisiting it whenever needed.

“Jealousy was a very hard emotion for me to overcome. When I was young, I had a lot of jealousy. By and by, I learned to get rid of it. It still crops up every now and then. It’s such a poisonous emotion because, at the end of the day, you’re no better off with jealousy. You’re unhappier, and the person you’re jealous of is still successful or good-looking or whatever they are.

One day, I realized with all these people I was jealous of, I couldn’t just choose little aspects of their life. I couldn’t say I want his body, I want her money, I want his personality. You have to be that person. Do you want to actually be that person with all of their reactions, their desires, their family, their happiness level, their outlook on life, their self-image? If you’re not willing to do a wholesale, 24/7, 100% swap with who that person is, then there is no point in being jealous.

Once I came to that realization, jealousy faded away because I don’t want to be anybody else. I’m perfectly happy being me.”

This was a huge help to me in understanding the roots of difficult emotions and getting over them. By recognizing when envy is present and shifting focus to self-improvement and gratitude, we can handle this challenging emotion with grace. It’s essential to embrace our uniqueness, celebrate our successes, and always remember that our life’s journey is personal and distinct to each of us.

Cheers!

PS: Nandrigal to Naval

I do send out my posts to very few people. Join my mailing list if you enjoy what you read.

• Instagram

The connection between humans and dogs has held up over time, giving us a cool example of parallel evolution. This awesome partnership, a mix of living and working side by side, hasn’t just changed how we and dogs appear. It’s also left a lasting mark on how we hang out, talk, and connect emotionally. As we dig into the story of how humans and dogs evolved together, we find a tale of both species adjusting to each other and rocking it together, marked by some big moments in our shared adventure.

Our story begins with the domestication of dogs, a significant process kicked off by early humans thousands of years ago. This mutually beneficial partnership brought advantages to both sides. Dogs became our loyal companions, hunting allies, and reliable guardians, enhancing our well-being. At the same time, we gained trustworthy companions, access to new hunting techniques, and increased security. This initial teamwork set the stage for the parallel evolution that has characterized our interdependent relationship throughout the ages.

The inquiry into the mutual domestication of humans and dogs has been a source of fascination for scientists, historians, and us for quite some time. While a definitive answer remains unknown, abundant evidence suggests a complex interplay between human selection and the self-domestication tendencies of wolves. Archaeological discoveries, dating back around 15,000 years, reveal the earliest signs of interactions between humans and dogs, offering intriguing insights into the origins of this extraordinary partnership.

Genetic studies lend further credence to the concept of coevolution, uncovering significant genetic changes in dogs since their divergence from wolves. These changes, including the reduction in tooth size, diminished aggression, and enhanced social cognition, closely mirror the traits favored by humans during the domestication process. Moreover, the impressive ability of dogs to understand human emotions, respond to commands, and anticipate needs acts as additional evidence of their coevolutionary adaptation to human society.

Certainly, humans played a crucial role in shaping dogs into the domesticated companions we know today. However, it’s crucial to recognize that wolves weren’t just passive observers in their own domestication. Their inherent social nature, opportunistic scavenging behavior, and ability to adapt to various environments likely played pivotal roles in their willingness to associate with humans. Over time, those wolves showing more tolerance of human presence and possessing traits beneficial to humans would have had a selective advantage, contributing to the gradual emergence of domesticated dogs.

A fascinating facet of parallel evolution is the simultaneous development of digestive adaptations in both humans and dogs. As humans transitioned from hunter-gatherer lifestyles to settled agricultural communities, their diets naturally expanded. Concurrently, dogs, deeply integrated into human societies, underwent adaptations, gaining the ability to digest a broader range of foods. Also, the social structures have strengthened the interdependence between humans and dogs, laying the groundwork for the profound companionship that defines our relationship today.

Communication stands as a fundamental pillar of any successful relationship, and the interaction between us and dogs is no exception. Dogs have refined their ability to interpret our gestures, facial expressions, and vocal cues. Likewise, we have developed their skill in understanding the nuanced language conveyed through barks, tail wags, and body postures, creating a silent yet profound connection that transcends the limitations of language.

Dogs have seamlessly integrated into various roles within our societies, showcasing remarkable versatility and adaptability. From herding livestock to safeguarding our homes and, in more recent times, serving as guide dogs, therapy animals, and search-and-rescue companions, dogs have consistently demonstrated their enthusiasm to collaborate with us. This cooperative spirit has emerged as a compelling force propelling the parallel evolution of both species as we collectively navigate the complexities of our shared journey.

Dogs, shaped by domestication and selective breeding, have developed intelligence that aligns with our needs. This shared cognitive landscape has streamlined training processes, enabling dogs to comprehend and respond effectively to our commands. The problem-solving abilities have heightened the collaborative essence of the human-dog relationship, highlighting the adaptability that defines our symbiotic connection.

Next is the cultivation of a deep emotional connection. Both species exhibit a capacity for empathy, forming profound emotional bonds that transcend the limitations of language. The loyalty and companionship offered by dogs have played a substantial role in enhancing our emotional well-being throughout history, creating a connection that goes beyond mere utility. This emotional bond forms the core of our enduring relationship, and they remain with us, becoming an integral part of our home.

Alright, wrapping it up, the story of how we and dogs evolved together is like this super cool tapestry of teamwork, adaptability, and shared wins. From the early days of turning wolves into our four-legged buddies to the awesome jobs dogs have today, it’s a tale that shows how we and dogs can roll with the punches. It’s a reminder of how strong and awesome our connection with other species can be, teaching us about teamwork and how it affects our own evolution. Even though they have a relatively short lifespan, let’s cherish and care for them with all our hearts.

Cheers!

PS: No offense to Cat people

Don’t miss out! Get notified about new blog posts straight to your inbox !  (No spam, pinky promise!)

Enter your email below to receive updates

Hold on, it’s not related to “Ace” or any offensive language. These are a pair of terms that have perplexed me at various junctures, and they continue to do so. I’m uncertain if it’s a paradox or whether I can achieve harmony between them.

The initial term in this discussion is “attachment,” and its roots can be traced back to Latin. Originating from the verb “attachare,” it signifies “to fasten or join.” Upon delving into the word “attachment,” I encountered various definitions, with its prevalence notably rising after the advent of attachment theory.

According to attachment theory, formulated by John Bowlby, attachment is characterized as an enduring psychological connection between human beings. It emphasizes the essential need to fit into social groups. These connections provide safety, support, and emotional fulfillment, fostering resilience and aiding in stress navigation.

The second concept under consideration is “authenticity.” The term “authenticity” finds its roots in the Greek word “authentikos,” signifying “original” or “genuine.” The Greek root “authentes” implies “one acting on one’s own authority” or “one who does things for himself.

There are a lot of definitions of authenticity. Jean-Paul Sartre posited that authenticity entails taking responsibility for one’s choices and actions and aligning one’s life with personal values and beliefs. In contemporary discourse, authenticity is frequently linked with staying true to oneself, upholding integrity, and openly expressing genuine thoughts and emotions.

Authenticity calls for the honest expression of one’s true self, rooted in personal values and beliefs. On the other hand, attachment centers on the emotional ties formed between people, highlighting the need for safety and intimacy. While authenticity encourages individuality and self-expression, attachment highlights the interdependence and shared emotional spaces within relationships.

Have you ever felt like you couldn’t be yourself in a relationship? Like you had to hide your true thoughts and feelings in order to belong? That’s the conflict between attachment and authenticity. Attachment is our need for security and connection, while authenticity is about being true to ourselves. These two needs can sometimes be at odds with each other, but they are both essential for healthy relationships.

In many situations, things get kind of confusing, right? We end up wondering how we should act. We nod along with everyone, especially those craving attention or a sense of belonging. But then, expressing ourselves? It’s like, Will they stick around, or am I going to get ditched? Will they still like me? You notice the ones who speak their minds, stand firm on their opinions, and set clear boundaries? Yeah, they usually roll with a smaller crew. It’s that whole deal of balancing between fitting in and staying true to yourself that shapes our connections, making them more real and all.

In Gabor Maté’s enlightening book, “The Myths of Normal,” he delves into the extremes we encounter. Emphasizing the pivotal role of attachment in the early stages of life, the narrative unfolds with a consideration of how our physiological makeup adapts to these fundamental connections. There was an amazing quote that was mentioned in the book.

“The onset of inauthenticity may be not be a choice, but with self-awareness and self-compassion, authenticity can be.”

We’ll dig into self-awareness later. Now, here’s the juicy part: authenticity happens when you’ve got solid, genuine connections. Being open and real builds these emotional bonds that make you feel safe. These bonds act like a safety net, letting you be your true self. It’s where authenticity converges with emotional attachment, forming relationships that are profoundly deep and emotionally satisfying. Sure, some folks might stick around, and others might bounce. In the end, what I’m getting at is that attachments are key at first, but as time goes on, finding your true self becomes the real deal.

Cheers!

PS: Happy Diwali ✨!

Don’t miss out! Get notified about new blog posts straight to your inbox !  (No spam, pinky promise!)

Enter your email below to receive updates

In the world of Korean drama, not every story is meant for everyone. If you’re not a dedicated K-Drama fan, you might not understand the unique charm of series like those written by Park Hae-young. Once upon a time, I used to watch dramas solely for the leads, especially if they included names like Lee Min Ho, Song Joong Ki, Park Hye-shin, or Park Seo Joon, no matter how cringe-worthy or tedious the plot seemed. If I started a series, I felt compelled to see it through to the end. However, things have changed for me in recent years.

Nowadays, my choice of K-dramas is no longer solely based on the star-studded cast. Instead, I pay closer attention to the writers, their previous works, reviews, and scripts. People often rave about J.K. Rowling’s Harry Potter series, but I must confess that I haven’t watched the movies or read the books. This marks the first time I find myself actively seeking out shows written by Park Hae-young.

It all began with “Liberation Notes,” followed by “My Mister” and “Another Miss Oh.” Park Hae-young has also co-authored a few movies that I’m yet to explore. When you delve into her creations, you’ll notice a few remarkable elements that set her work apart. Most of my childhood was filled with movies where the focus was primarily on the early days of love and the happier stages of life. If the lead characters encountered any hardship or struggle, it was typically resolved with a short, uplifting song or a “happily ever after” ending. Park Hae-young’s works, however, take a different path.

Here are a few things I’ve observed in her storytelling:

#Realistic Portrayal of Life: In contrast to numerous K-Dramas, Park Hae-young’s narratives explore the everyday facets of life. Her stories are more inclined to address common challenges like financial troubles or relationship issues rather than embarking on world-saving missions or battling against evil forces. This approach lends her dramas a sense of grounding and authenticity that sets them apart. What truly stands out is her ability to depict hardships, ordinary moments, and even tough times in a way that feels remarkably genuine and skillfully nuanced.

#Complex Character Development: Park Hae-young has a remarkable talent for creating characters with layers and depth. The way she depicts the main characters dealing with emotions like grief, guilt, shame, and their personal struggles is truly outstanding. These characters are not one-dimensional; they evolve and grow throughout the series, which keeps you captivated and emotionally invested in their journey.

#Capturing Life’s Everyday Rhythms: Her characters are not caught up in grand adventures or epic quests, but rather, they navigate the routines and rituals that most of us experience in our own lives. Going to work, doing household chores, and carrying out daily tasks take center stage in her dramas, bringing a sense of relatability and authenticity that is often missing in more fantastical narratives. One noteworthy element in her dramas is the choice of soundtracks that accompany these everyday moments.

#Exploring the Concept of Worship: One of the fascinating aspects of Park Hae-young’s work is her exploration of the concept of “worship.” In two of her dramas, Park Hae-young introduces the role of worship, where one character worships another. This concept adds depth and complexity to the relationships portrayed in her stories. It’s not about traditional worship but rather an intense admiration, respect, or emotional connection that goes beyond the ordinary.

Her works are filled with depth, and I feel the need to revisit them for a better understanding. While I currently rely on English subtitles to follow the story, it would be a great experience to have access to the original scripts, allowing for a deeper insight into her storytelling. Her ability to eloquently convey complex themes through words is truly remarkable, and of course, the actors’ performances play a significant role in bringing her vision to life.

It’s surprising that she’s not on social media or doing online interviews. But I’m glad there’s a Wikipedia page about her. I’m really looking forward to her future projects.

Cheers!

Check out the previous post: Movie Reviews

Follow on IG & X for more!

If you like what you see and wish to support my work, then

Share your thoughts/suggestion at the comment section or mail at

randomwhyss[@]gmail[dot]com

Don’t miss out! Get notified about new blog posts straight to your inbox !

(No spam, pinky promise!)

Enter your mail to receive updates